To say the last couple of years of my life have been crazy is an understatement. The last twenty-four months have been a series of successive challenges and transitions. Family illnesses and deaths, moving, friends becoming distant, home-renovation just to name a few.
I’m hearing from a lot of folks who've had similar experiences in their own lives as well. The toxic soup of a culture we’re all currently living in only adds to the feelings of stress and chaos. No matter where in the spectrum our politics reside it’s safe to say we all feel the effects of the toxicity even if we can’t exactly agree on the source of it.
For those who are caregivers who bear considerable responsibility it’s so easy to defer our own needs—there are only so many hours in the day, right? Sometimes it’s difficult to rationalize taking an hour or two from the day’s productivity for self-care. Even those people who consider themselves as highly self-aware can rapidly rationalize their way right into energy deficit (burnout). It’s not that we don’t realize how important it is to take care of ourselves but, over time it’s like a kind of amnesia sets in.
I’m normally a very optimistic and easygoing person but, lately, I’ve noticed that the bright side is harder to see some days. My patience also wasn’t what it used to be. It was as though my well of inner resilience was running dry. After a few weeks of feeling this way I realized something had to change and began to seek help.
After a little research I found a great book to help guide me through the dark clouds I’ve been trying to navigate my way through. It’s called, “the Myth of Normal” by Gabor and Daniel Maté. I’m happy to say this book is helping to reframe things considerably.
I also decided to take a few hours this past weekend to do something restorative and put myself into the healing hands of The Wellness Center in Minneapolis. As it turns out I had an unused two year old gift card for a massage that they had to email me to remind me of.
After an hour on the massage table I felt a lot more like my old self. It’s hard to believe how connected our bodies and minds are. Over time mental stress is deposited in our bodies in a variety of ways and, if left unchecked, can cause a whole host of injuries and illnesses. Julie, the masseuse, said I was carrying a huge amount of stress in my shoulders and once she expertly obliterated all the knots it felt like the dark clouds parted and the angels started singing again. That was the moment I realized exactly how far down the abyss I had actually started to slip.
It was a reminder to me to put self-care on autopilot however I can. From here on out I’ll book another massage or float-tank session regularly, every four or five weeks. It's so important for us to regularly do some kind of self care check-in to access our levels of inner resilience. If we don't take care of ourselves we can't take care of others.
How long has it been since you’ve done something restorative, just for yourself? In what ways can you put self-care on autopilot?
Eric Vance Walton
Be well, make the most of this day. Thank you for reading!
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