Jealousy according to an advanced dictionary is: having a morbid fear of rivalry in love or preference given to another; painfully suspicious of the faithfulness of a husband, wife, or lover.
I believe jealousy comes with love, because in it is a morbid fear of rivalry. To everyone who is in love, there's at least a small iota of jealousy, not because they don't trust their partner, but because they expect certain preference to be given to them. My lover once told me she's a very jealous type. Even though she hasn't displayed that act of jealousy, I understood the point she was making. In as much as she tries to hide that feeling from becoming obvious, the way she suddenly becomes clingy when I'm around other females tells it all.
Just like my lover, I try as much not to act jealous when she gets too close with people of the other sex. But deep inside, I question every laugh, time, and attention she gives to another. When one doesn't feel jealous, it's confirmation that they don't truly love. Lovers hate rivalry and try as much to protect what they have. However, there's a thin line between jealousy and possession.
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I've read news of lovers killing their partners out of jealousy, and I've heard of lovers who restrict their partners from associating with anyone. When jealousy grows to this extent, it becomes evil. Jealousy, I believe, was not meant to disconnect lovers from their friends and family, but to protect what they have with love. But unfortunately, certain jealousy goes beyond the line. Partners check every conversation, phone call, their whereabouts, and monitor everything that goes on in their lives. That's the point where jealousy turns into possession, denying one the freedom that comes with love. It's at this point that jealousy becomes a thing of harm instead of a tool that protects.
I am not a jealous lover, but I feel jealous sometimes when I notice certain preference is given to another. However, I don't react; I act tough and smile through. I don't allow the thoughts to get to me. I tell myself there's nothing bad in getting close to others. I understand how important relationships are and how they can be a blessing sometimes. This understanding helps me deal with it. Even God identified himself as a jealous God, which means where love exists, jealousy exists, but not one that harms or denies one the freedom that comes with trust.
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