One thing I have come to realize about marriage is that familiarity can change the way people communicate with each other.
When a relationship is new, we are usually very intentional with our words. We are patient, attentive and careful because we don't want to hurt the person we love. We listen to their problems, reassure them when they are worried, notice when something is wrong and make an effort to make them feel special. But after spending years together, things can become different.
The excitement of the early days may reduce, responsibilities increase, and both partners become more comfortable with each other. Suddenly, the person who once listened patiently may now respond with irritation. The person who used to be gentle with their words may start speaking without considering how those words will affect their partner.
Sometimes, we become so familiar with our spouse that we stop treating them with the same consideration we had when we were still trying to win their heart.
We assume they already know we love them, so we stop expressing it, we assume they understand us, so we stop explaining ourselves properly, we assume they will always forgive us, so we become less careful about what we say.
We become comfortable enough to show our worst side without making an effort to correct it. But marriage should not make us careless.
Yes, marriage comes with disagreements. Two people cannot live together for years without getting angry, misunderstanding each other or having moments when they simply need some space. There will be stressful days, financial challenges, family issues, tiredness and situations where emotions get the better of us. That is normal.
What matters is how we handle those moments. Being angry does not mean we have to insult each other. Being frustrated does not give us permission to belittle our spouse. Having an argument does not mean we should bring up every past mistake just to win the current one.
Sometimes, the most loving thing we can do during an argument is pause before responding. Sometimes we need to remember that our spouse is not our enemy. We are both supposed to be on the same side, even when we disagree.
And please, let's stop comparing our marriages to what we see outside. You may look at another couple and think they have the perfect marriage, but you don't know what happens behind their closed doors. Every marriage has its own struggles, and social media only shows us a small part of people's lives.
Instead of constantly comparing your spouse with someone else, learn to appreciate the things your spouse does right. Notice the little things, say thank you, apologize when you are wrong, listen when they need to talk. Ask how their day went, Compliment them, pray together, laugh together, and most importantly, don't allow familiarity to remove kindness from your marriage.
The person you married is still a human being with feelings. They can be strong and still need encouragement, they can love you deeply and still be hurt by your words, they can forgive you and still remember how you made them feel.
Marriage should give us the freedom to be ourselves, but that freedom should come with responsibility. You should be able to tell your spouse when you are angry, but you should also know how to communicate that anger without destroying their dignity.
You should be comfortable enough to be vulnerable, but never so comfortable that you stop caring about their feelings.
Love is not only demonstrated during romantic moments. Sometimes love is seen in the way we speak when we are angry, the patience we show when we are tired, and the willingness to listen when we would rather walk away.
Don't let the person you once prayed for become the person you take for granted. Don't let familiarity make you careless, keep choosing kindness, keep choosing respect, keep choosing communication.
Because a healthy marriage is not one without disagreements. It is one where two people continue to choose each other, even when things are not perfect.
Thank for checking on my post and have a wonderful day
Posted Using INLEO