Man, it has been a minute since I have been on here, and honestly, there is a reason for that. Life has been throwing some heavy stuff my way and I have been dealing with a lot of internal battles that I haven't really talked about much. Depression, despair, anxiety, the whole mess. I have been in a dark place, if I am being real with you all. But I am coming out of it, and I want to share what has been helping me because I know I am not the only one out there fighting these demons.
This one is going to get a little personal, but that is kind of the point, right? If me sharing my journey helps one person, then it is worth putting it all out there.
The Dark Place
Let me just start by saying that the last stretch of life has been rough. Too much to talk about, but things have just been real hard the last couple of years, and losing my 'Ride-or-Die' dog of 17 years, Chip back in April just kicked the downward spiral into high gear. I have been dealing with depression and anxiety that honestly had me questioning a lot of things. Not in a good way either. That kind of despair where you wake up and just don't see the point of any of it. You go through the motions but you are not really there. You are just existing, not living. Everything that I have tried to do has been a one step forward, ten steps back kind of thing, and I am just tired of it all.
I have talked about cutting the noise of society before and how flying FPV drones has been my escape. That is still true, but there was something deeper going on that just ripping quads around the bando wasn't going to fix. I needed something to help me reset my mind, to help me see things from a different perspective. I needed to get into a positive state of mind and nothing I was doing was getting me there.
Enter Microdosing
So I started microdosing mushrooms. Yeah, I said it. And no, I am not talking about eating a handful and tripping balls in the woods, haha. I am talking about tiny, sub-perceptual doses that you take on a schedule. Small enough that you don't feel high or anything like that. You just go about your day. But over time, something starts to shift.
For me, it has been a game changer. I am not going to sit here and tell you it is some magic cure all because nothing is, and everyone is different. But for me, it has helped me with the depression, the despair, the anxiety. It has helped me get to a place where I can actually think clearly and start working through the crap instead of just drowning in it.
The thing that microdosing has really done for me though, and this is the big one, is that it helped me realize something that I kind of already knew but couldn't really feel. None of this crap that society throws at us matters. Money, materialism, social status, keeping up with the Joneses, all of it. It is all bullshit. All life really is about is just making it from moment to moment. That is it. That is the whole game.
The Investment World Trap
Now, I know a lot of you reading this are into trading and investing, just like me. I have been in the crypto and trading space for years so I get it. We are always looking at charts, analyzing price action, trying to predict what Bitcoin or Hive or gold or whatever is going to do next week, next month, next year.
But here is the thing. We spend so much time looking forward that we forget to look at right now. We are so focused on what the future price action of this or that asset might do that we don't look at the fact that we just need to focus on the present moment. The now. That is all we actually have.
You can never guarantee the future. No matter how good your charting is, no matter how solid your strategy is, no matter what some guru on X or YouTube tells you. The future is not real. It hasn't happened yet and worrying about it all the time is going to kill you, I almost let it kill me, literally. And here is the hard truth that most people in this space don't want to hear. Nothing any corporation, government, institution, influencer, or so called expert says is real. None of it. It is all a form of the Matrix. They are all just selling you a version of reality that keeps you plugged in and playing their game so they can continue to extract more and more from you.
This is a lesson that goes way beyond trading. You can take this into business, into relationships, into really any aspect of life. Focus on the now. Be present. Make the best decision you can with the information you have right in front of you at this moment. Stop living in a future that doesn't exist yet.
Finding My Own Way Out
For me, the way out of the Matrix has been becoming completely self sufficient in every way possible. I have talked about this before in my post about leaving the system. Growing my own food, generating my own power, using crypto and cash instead of feeding the banking system, stacking metals, all of it. Every step I take toward self sufficiency is a step further away from their control.
But what microdosing helped me realize is that the self sufficiency thing isn't just about money and resources. It is about mental self sufficiency too. Not relying on the system for my happiness. Not letting the news cycle dictate my mood. Not letting the price of Bitcoin determine whether I have a good day or a bad day. Being emotionally and mentally independent.
You have to find your own way out of the Matrix. Nobody is going to show you the door. No politician, no guru, no influencer, no system. It is up to you. And the path looks different for everybody. For me it has been a combination of getting back to the land, flying drones to clear my head, and now adding microdosing to the toolkit to help me stay grounded and present.
Health is Wealth
This brings me to probably the most important part of this whole post. I am having to put more focus on my health, both physically and mentally. And I mean real focus, not just saying it like a New Year's resolution and forgetting about it by February.
Health is wealth. Period. Without it, nothing you can gain in money or possessions is going to help you. You could have a million Hive, a mountain of gold, the baddest solar setup on the planet, and the most productive garden in the county. But if you become terminally ill, or you are too sick to get up and play with your kids or grandkids, none of it means a damn thing.
I have been thinking about this a lot lately, especially after losing my dad to cancer. It really puts things into perspective. All the stuff we chase, all the bags we hold, all the gains we stack, none of it matters if we don't have our health. And I am not just talking about physical health. Mental health is just as important, maybe even more so because if your mind is in a dark place, your body is going to follow it down.
That is why I have been taking steps to take care of both. Eating better, getting physical activity in whether that is working out, hiking around the farm, or just doing physical labor around the homestead. And working on the mental side through microdosing, through flying, through spending time in nature, and through just being present in the moment instead of constantly worrying about the future or stressing about the past.
The Takeaway
So here is what I want you to take from this rambling post, haha. If you are struggling with depression, anxiety, despair, any of that stuff, you are not alone. I have been there and I am still working through it. But there are tools out there that can help. For me, microdosing mushrooms has been one of those tools. It helped me see through the BS that society feeds us and realize that the only thing that matters is right now, this moment.
Stop living for a future that might never come. Stop measuring your worth by your portfolio or your social status or what kind of car you drive. Focus on being healthy, being present, being self sufficient, and being there for the people you love. That is what real wealth is.
And if you are in the trading and investing world like me, take this lesson into your charts. You can never predict the future. Focus on what is happening right now. Manage your risk in the present moment. Don't get so caught up in what might happen that you miss what is happening.
I am still on this journey. I don't have it all figured out and I probably never will. But I am in a better place than I was, and I am grateful for that. Sometimes you just have to find your own way out of the darkness, and for me, a little help from some mushrooms, a lot of time in nature, and a shift in perspective has been doing the trick.
Until next time...
Be cool, be real, and always abide with you my dudes!
