Thumbnail image is generated by AI and it contains my real face. Other images are from google graphics. Whole post is fully written by me without any AI help.

Welcome gamers!

Its been over 2 weeks since I posted about my comeback to CS2 and Hive. I was trying to keep you updated with my CS2 progress and on top of that I was writing some series reviews through scrobble, but as allways things didn't go the way I planned.

Lately I've been busy and couldn't play CS2. Why?

Most people don't know but I'm an owner of OTS (Open Tibia Server) called "Naruto Shinobi Fight". It is a private server of game "Tibia" but based on a multiple anime like Naruto,Dragon Ball,Bleach etc.

In the Tibia private servers communtiy servers are not permament. That means the progress of players do not stay, we do it in a "Edition way". It means we launch the edition and the edition lasts for about 1-4 months where players compete in PvP, level and other categories. After this time we work on an update and then we launch new edition with fresh reset, where players start from zero and compete again. Recently when I started playing a lot of CS2 I realized its time for me to make an update and launch a new edition, as it is my main source income I had to put all my energy into this. Working on a new update took most of my day time so at the evenings I had to choose I either play CS2 or relax watching some series and I did choose watching series. On top of working on my OTS, I was going to the gym, doing the 10k footsteps daily, focusing on my skincare,haircare and health routine. I was also constantly browing job offers and applying to them as I'm looking for a real job right now. All of this made me really stressed, low calories diet, a lot of activity and working on my Tibia server. The days were passing by and I finally finished the update and launched the new edition of my server, then I had to constantly answer players questions, answering was my "job" most of the day so I couldn't really go play CS2.

Next Chapter: I got time to play CS2 again but something unexpected happened

After some time things got a bit quiet, players stopped asking so much and I finally had some more time to play CS2 but as allways my stupid brain made wrong decision and to relax from all the stress,programming,thinking about finding job,diet,trainings I walked into the "Beers world". I bought 2 beers and played some CS2 at the evening, at first it was okay, I won 2 games and I reached 1950 ELO - I needed to win only 2 games to get to level 10 but the next day I also bought 2 beers, then next day 3, then next day 4 and from this day I've been buying 4 beers every day for a week. As you can guess Beers+CS2 is not a good combination. This drinking habbit made me skip gym, skip doing all the healthy habbits, I started feeling worse and because of it playing worse. The Lose Streak has started, I started losing all games I played and I lost over 200 ELO. This derank was huge, I only needed 2 games to level 10 and then I deranked to level 8. Right now in Faceit Season 9 I sit at 49% winratio having 37 wins 39 loses. My elo points are 1740 elo with level 8.

I still keep doing this - playing drunk and this leads to nowhere. I might derank even more...

The problem is allways the same - its alcohol

I do struggle with alcohol for over 8 years. There are times when I don't drink for months, but there are also times where I drink for months. Its more like 1-2months of drinking then 3-4 months of not drinking. It goes like this for years. I can quit alcohol, I've done that multiple times in the past 8 years but I cannot quit it forever. I allways come back. In my life there are 2 phases - Progression Phase and Destruction Phase, right now being in a destruction phase I'm not that productive so as you can see - I play worse, I post less frequently, I don't train, I don't diet. I know I'm capable of reaching level 10 on faceit, but for sure not in this state and I have no idea when I will go back to my progression phase. Like I said I have 2 phases , they switch randomly. Its gonna be just this one random day when I wake up and decide "OKAY ITS TIME TO REBUILD WHAT I DESTROYED".

Well... There is not much more to say for now, we will see where this goes. Am I gonna derank even more or re-gain the ELO and Level that I lost. Let's see. I will keep you updated in the next posts.

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