Today, I'm going to be doing a short review on the newest film out of a slasher franchise spanning several decades, a franchise that has ascended beyond any other when it had Busta Rhymes do a bicycle kick on the serial killer like the alpha chad he is; That's right, today, we're going to be talking about the newest Halloween film. The newest entry using the same name as the original is a direct sequel to said original, meaning it has retconned all that has happened in the franchise previously. Which honestly isn't the worst thing, considering most of the films released over the years have been about as good as an elderly mans flaccid cock slapping you in the face. And, while some people are into that, many are not.
Thankfully, this film doesn't smell like old man ass, however. This movie is the first slasher film in the past several years, that in my opinion, has actually been good. It takes all of the good shit from the original film and brings it back, while also adding in some new stuff to the mix. One thing they absolutely do right is Michael Myers himself, as he is as terrifying as ever in this movie. His pace is that of a drunken Frankenstein, using a very menacing power walk to reach his victims while also worrying about failing a breathalyzer.
Another aspect of his character they do right besides being terrifying is how he handles killing his victims. They don't take things in a ridiculous manner with insane amounts of gore or draw the kills out. They're often very quick, only taking a few seconds of time before moving on. On top of that they're also pretty creative. The kills are actually kinda the opposite of what you'd expect in a typical slasher movie. In most slasher films, the deaths are big and flashy. Mostly because that's the pay off considering there's usually a small amount of victims. In this one, Michael Myers is basically going trick or treating, but his bucket is a knife and his candy is death. So, you know, just a typical Halloween in Cleveland, Ohio.
The rest of the characters are done pretty well for the most part as well. Jamie Lee Curtis does a terrific job as grizzled survivor Laurie Strode, and I love the dynamic going on between her and Michael Myers in this film. Throughout the movie she feels like she holds the responsibility of being his personal executioner, while Myers himself only exists to be a killing machine of pure evil. It's never even shown if he actually gives a fuck about trying to kill her, or if it's all just a dark instinct that compels him. It's one thing about his character that's facinating, you've no idea what his motivation is for doing what he does.
Now, there's plenty of other characters I could talk about in the film. But, I'll just say they're all done pretty well except for one. Laurie Strodes daughter, Karen. Karen was basically raised to be an ass pounding assassin throughout her life, and she greatly resents her mother for her upbringing. The concept of the character and dealing with the paranoia of her mother is a neat idea, but it's not executed very well. I just felt like the character wasn't flushed out enough, and didn't bring much to the table. She has a few scenes that I enjoyed, but for the most part I just felt like her character did not work or seem to care enough for the situation that they were in.
For the most part, I loved this film. Well, up until the 3rd act of the film that is where apparently there's been an off screen lobotomy done to all of the characters. I would say pretty much all the characters are smart and make good choices in the film, but for some reason it feels like everyone has just butt chugged pure fluoride and rotted their brain. Laurie Strode beings doing some of the dumbest shit I've ever seen in the last 20-25 minutes of the film, and it was just a big turn off. Laurie is basically a doomsday prepper, preparing herself for the inevitable against Michael, so you'd figure she'd have a solid plan ready after all this time. Well, turns out her plan is to go into her bunker, shoot through the bunker and scream at him giving away her and her family's position. Seriously, was there a part where Laurie smokes meth for courage before he shows up that we missed or something?
Another issue I had at the end is while she is looking through the house to try and find Michael, she is carrying a firearm and still insists on getting up and personal with doors/closets when she suspects he is on the other side. Meaning she is voluntarily getting within melee distance from a man with a knife, when she could just stick with her paranoid/cautious nature and shoot a round or two into the closet or door to be safe. There was just a lot of silly shit going on at the end that made no sense. Things just stop being as tightly written and cohesive at the end, and it shows.
Overall, though, I really enjoyed the movie. It is by far one of the better modern day slasher films out there, and pays homage in a competent way to the original. Besides everyone turning into a cave dwelling troglodyte at the end of the film, it mostly stays true to itself and is a fun, scary experience. These days we get nothing but reboots and remakes that shit all over beloved franchises, but, this one is faithful and competent. I'd definitely recommend anyone into horror or slasher flicks to check this one out. If you felt differently about this film, feel free to go fuck yourself you beta cuck let me know down below in the comments. And, until next time, take it sleazy you god damn sluts.
