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Star Wars films, ranked

Review by @gooddream · 2747d · of Star Wars

I realize this is a sensitive subject for everyone that is a fan. Therefore please understand this is simply how I feel. My opinion is the only one that talks inside my head so I can't possibly be wrong :P I welcome your comments and for you to rank on your own of course.

This is a list from last place to first

The Phantom Menace

With all the hype surrounding this film you would have thunk they would have made it at least someone good. I waiting in line for hours like a good nerd and was in a completely sold out cinema in a 12 theater complex that had dedicated 11 screens to this movie. The groans from the audience and the booing that happened at the end of it kind of solidified my opinion that it was pretty universally hated. I have since gone back to try to watch it again but I just can't make it though.

Attack of the Clones

Equally as bad as the first one, this had the benefit of Jar Jar shutting up a bunch because I think they got the message that everyone hates his involvement in the films at all. This was only mildly less terrible than Phantom, perhaps because of the focus on Boba Fett. Still a snooze-fest though and I tried to watch this one again to search for redeeming qualities and couldn't make it through.

The Last Jedi

This was so frustrating to watch. I saw one of the most iconic figures of the Jedi universe reduced to a slapstick almost useless tool who abruptly dies after making himself a hologram. The entire films was predicated on a ridiculous notion of two ships chasing eachother and one of the running out of fuel (fuel has never been an issue ever before) and don't get me started on Lea's ability to fly and that we can now light speed through larger ships... which if that was possible the entire original trilogy is rendered unnecessary.

SOLO

I don't really have a lot to say about Solo that hasn't already been talked to death. I simply didn't find it entertaining and am frustrated that it took a whimsical path (which should be expected with Disney at the helm.)

Revenge of the Sith

Hayden Christensen took the whining to "11" in this one and I don't know if you are aware of this but he really doesn't work anymore. I am not the only one who is still upset with him over his butchering of Darth Vader's legacy. However, this movie was significantly less bad than EP 1 and 2 because they toned down the campy humor and focused more on Darth, which was the entire point of the first 3 films.


The "execute order 66" sequences were pretty awesome too.

The Force Awakens

There are a lot of people out there that make the claim that The Force Awakens is simply a remake of A New Hope and I don't disagree with you. However, i like the dark way that the film presents the story and the updated CGI without OVERUSING it was pretty wild. Plus Kylo Ren is still a complete badass in this film... they ruined that of course but I found this film to be great and was nice enough to recapture me as a fan... albeit briefly.

Return of the Jedi

Why isn't this ranked higher? One word: Ewoks.


The very idea that they would be capable of overrunning a squadron of stromtroopers with sticks, rocks, and bamboo hang-gliders is ridiculous, even for Star Wars. I understand it needed to happen, but disagree with how it was executed. Ewoks were introduced for obvious merchandising opportunities and as a kid I am sure I enjoyed it, as an adult, this dropped the movie a few points.

Rogue One

I fully expect people to disagree with this but Rogue One was a dark movie. The way that this is filmed is the way that I wish they had filmed all of the recent ones. The fact that Stormtroopers are not completely useless for once was a nice touch. I have always felt as though they were unnecessarily and overly incompetent throughout the entire saga and the "Death Squad Troopers" were incredible.


Anyone who argues that the Darth Vader sequence at the end of the film is anything short of amazing is simply wrong. That is one of the best fight sequences that this franchise has ever seen and fully solidifies why it is that Darth is a man of immense power that definitely needs to be feared.

A New Hope

The one that started them all. This gem introduced me and a legion of other nerds to a universe that we would become and remain fans of for nearly 40 years now. I was very young but I, like nearly everyone else, was completely mesmerized. I think following this film i managed to acquire several thousand dollars worth of toys over the next 10 years or so. Of course I mistreated the hell out of them and they were likely sold on yard sales for 50 cents. Pity.

Why is this not number 1????? It's my list! Make your own :P

The Empire Strikes Back

I only need one reason to love this film over the others. Hoth

That entire battle on Hoth with the At-At's is just epic and the CGI stands up to today's standards ALMOST. the movie was made in 1980 and we didn't really even have computers then. This is what makes it so damn incredible. I also really enjoyed that for once, the bad guys kind of won in this film. Also, even though I was unaware of it at the time. The fact that Darth is in fact Luke's father was kept such a secret that even the actors were not told about it until the day of filming. It wasn't in the script and most of the cast and crew were not even told about that plot twist until they saw it for the first time at the premiere also.

The Holiday Special

Just kidding. However, if you are a die-hard fan like me I challenge you to watch it. It is just the worst thing ever. There is a very good reason why Lucas tried so hard to bury this thing.

So what do you think? I expect disagreement and I want it! If you have something to say I would like to hear about it. Am I wrong? Do you agree with me? I think, since there are 10 films involved.

ps. my apologies if there are typos but as luck would have it i had to depart quickly at the end of compiling this. I will fix them later.

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Comments · 13

  • @yamanaminami(25)· 2743d

    Anakin Skywalker to Darth Vadar is the most dramatic twist in the whole series. Agree, the Empire Strikes Back is the first rank.

  • @videoarchiver(29)· 2745d

    Just gonna disagree a bit there. The problem wasn't Hayden Christensen, but the direction. As the Nostalgia Critic pointed out, when he doesn't have to talk, he does quite a lot with just the facial expressions. The whole prequel trilogy is a classic case of good actors being stuck with a bad director.

    I know I'm nitpicking, but I'm tired of people picking on him for something that was out of his control.

  • @fakeinternetnews(57)· 2745d

    Other than Rouge One being awesome, I like to pretend that the other Disney era films simply do not exist. Solo is on Netflix or Amazon and I am giving it a pass based on all the reviews from people I respect that hated it.

    So my order is:

    1. A New Hope

    2. Empire Strikes Back

    3)Rogue One - I really enjoyed it for a lot of reasons. Two reasons were that Gold Leader was still a by the book dork. And Red Leader was still from Planet Alabama. Also liked the symbolism of the Iraq War and the Vietnam War. I think that was about as poetic as Disney will ever get. And that is because I think they missed the fact the director was making a statement about war by putting those elements into the film. (But the Forest Whitaker character was lame! But that is the only thing I didn't like).

    4)Return of the Jedi, (would be ranked higher if they would have made Endor a Wookie planet and not a planet filled with those stupid Ewoks!)

    Lets not even get into the Expanded Universe. Well, OK, lets! The second I heard there was no Grand Admiral Thrawn in the new films was the second I new they would suck.

    Also an old first person shooter than ran on the Doom engine, Star Wars Dark Forces had an interesting back plot and cool new villains.

    So even though it wasn't a film, I am including it here as a number 5 because the Empire secretly building a robotic endo-skeleton with claws like Wolverine to eventually put into it's Storm Trooper suits is a wild and awesome idea.

    Also, this game came up with the concept of a Super Trooper armor that would have been a great match up for Jedis. And would have made for some epic baddies and great fight scenes.

    As for the Disney era films, "It's a trap!".

  • @rishir(28)· 2745d

    After watching The Last Jedi, I'm convinced that the Star Wars universe is headed for the trashcan. It makes the prequels look good.

  • @cristiancaicedo(75)· 2745d

    Talking about opinions, I would have placed Revenge of the Sith higher on the top and Solo a little bit lower, but I agree in almost everything. Good post. Thanks for sharing.

  • @snoreball(63)· 2746d

    The last jedi shouldn't be on this list. Not because it's bad (it is). But because it is not a star wars film; it is a leftist porno disguised as a star wars film.

  • @cheese4ead(61)· 2747d

    Amazing run down of all the movies @gooddream

    I pretty much agree with everything you have put with a few tweaks and repositions here and there. Here goes:

    The Last Jedi.

    Even saying those three words makes me bring up a little bit of sick. How can they get it so wrong? To sum it up the story line is just badly written and the whole thing just god damn awful.

    Firstly, 'The Force is Female'! Aah......oooookaay. It could work but to the detriment of everything and I mean everything! OMG. You've already mentioned the details of storyline that is pointless and shockingly bad.

    Other issues in short: Poe phone call to Hux comedy that has no business in SW, milking a creature sat up with a human like pose and has breasts, I've just threw up a bit again, the crap chase across space, fuel? WTF, Hux becoming a joke, Poe becoming a joke (there's a theme emerging here) and so much more I could go on all day.

    But the one thing that I instantly found unforgivable was Luke throwing the lightsaber over his head and down the cliff face. This item of such significance in his life that has guided his destiny, for good or bad, and he disrespects it like that. Wrong!

    Thank you Ryan 'I never even watched the Force Awakens' Johnson.

    Attack of the Clones

    Boring and literally a bridge between 1 and 3. Nuff said.

    The Phantom Menace and Revenge of the Sith

    I can't split the two. I don't hate them but I was ultimately disappointed with them as well. Like you have said earlier, they have their moments. For instance: The story of Darth Plagueis the wise, my brother thought this was the best bit of all three prequels and he's probably right. I do like the darker nature of ROTS but some of the acting is appalling. I'm sure green screen everywhere has something to do with it. The anticipation for TPM was huge and I was willing to give it a bit of leeway to see where we were heading.

    It's kind of sad but I bought a new sound system at the time of TPM and the pod race scene sounds amazing so it scores for that.

    On the down side Jar Jar friggin Stinks

    Solo

    WHY?

    Rogue One

    They did some nice things and at this point I believed Disney were still trying to respect and honor the past while trying to, carefully, move into the future. How wrong I was. It was also chopped and changed with director firings and production and editing changes. I think they turned something of great potential into a bit of a dogs dinner.

    The Force Awakens

    Ahhhhh! Back on track after the decade of the green screen debacle. Yeah it's a rehash of ANH but I didn't care. A modernised star wars with grit and darkness. It looked great, it sounded great and was a decent start to the new era.

    If the new 'Luke' has to be a female then so be it but please make her character poignant, well written, relevant and interesting. They were teetering on the brink with this one and have subsequently eff'ed it up in TLJ. I like Daisy Ridley and Rey could be awesome but they seem to want us to like her just because she's a female lead. Daring anyone to question it or disagree with it. Just write the damn characters better!

    The Return of the Jedi

    I totally agree with you on this one. I love it but........... Ewoks! I heard somewhere that originally the Ewoks weren't Ewoks but were Wookies, which absolutely makes more sense. The only reason they adjusted it was for the reason you gave, merchandising!

    The Empire Strikes Back

    Critically acclaimed as the best of the saga and probably is. Hoth is great, luke and dad scene (spoiler alert 😁 ), Dagoba and actual training!!! Hello Disney!

    A masterpiece.

    A New Hope

    Why I'm a fan. Why I'm writing and half ranting right now! My memories of my uncle and my father taking me to the cinema as a five year old. Queuing all the way down the street to get in, terrified that you wouldn't. The rumble of the star destroyer flying overhead just blew my mind and that feeling has stayed with me till this day.

    I love Star Wars and everything it has taught me to believe in. The cutting edge technology used for the benefit of the universe it was creating. Comedy that was situational and subtle, Characters and relationships you could believe in and an honesty and integrity without pushing agendas.

    I just hope that JJ Abrams rectifies at least some of the abomination that was TLJ and gives us back our Star Wars. A Star Wars that we all can enjoy, young and old.

    Sorry for going on a bit.

    Gaz

  • @tcpolymath(69)· 2747d

    The Clone Wars?

    My main objection is that I'm not sure it's quite ok to rank the new ones before the third one comes out. I think The Last Jedi made The Force Awakens objectively worse by just casually ditching the idea of there being some narrative behind Phasma. Who knows what they might do next.

    I really disliked Rogue One at the time, but what's come since has really made it look better by contrast.

    I'm probably slotting Spaceballs in at #2 or #3 in the same way that Galaxy Quest is clearly the best Star Trek movie.

  • @bluelazer(46)· 2747d

    Impressive and I will not quibble on some order or other details as in all matters S W - there is no finer than EMPIRE! Ink on my starboard fyi

    btw: Utter disdain for the Disney offerings....Rogue 1 having some SITH merit I will admit...

  • @anaerwu(64)· 2747d

    I was a huge fan of Star Wars until they decide to make a prequel. The hole story of Darth Vader, Han Solo are boring, they focus on making money not entertaining the fans.

    Posted using Partiko iOS

  • @iamevilradio(62)· 2747d

    I want to preface this with saying I am not really a fan of the Star Wars films. I can't for the life of me understand the insane popularity of a franchise whose biggest fans will openly hate and rip apart over half the films in the franchise. At the end of the day though, your list is pretty identical to mine (I might bump Revenge Of The Sith up one, as the darkness of the Jedi's being murdered is pretty memorable), preferring the films with the balls to end on a loss which is why Empire would be at the top of my list as well. Good list and don't apologize for Rouge One being that high. I could even make an argument for it being at number two since it gracefully navigates new characters and continuity that the rest of the newer films hasn't figured out in a way that I enjoyed more than I expected, perhaps because it wasn't completely bogged down in expectations.

  • @kaminchan(76)· 2747d

    I didn’t realise there were so many new additions to Star War! I missed quite a few! Got to get some dvds!

    Posted using Partiko iOS

  • @holoz0r(78)· 2747d

    My disagreement is that this list is about Star Wars, not Star Trek, which is far better if you're looking for actual Science Fiction about how humans take their place in the universe instead of fantasy sword swinging antics :D

    I'm slowly working my way through the Star Trek series(es) and movies for the first time, and having consumed everything Star Wars that I can muster (all the films above, except the holiday special) - and the best games of the series (KOTOR I and II) - I feel... safe saying this.

    having said that...

    (I am prepared to be flamed for this remark!)