For the past few days, I've been very reflective, a lot of things have not worked out well for me since February, and I have kept going, making mistakes, trying different things, wasting time, effort, learning new things, gaining tough experience and still continued to fail.
It got so bad, that I decided to start seeking for help, I got more frustrated because the help I needed didn't come, but someone a few days now, after months of trying and failing, it looks like one of the things I've tried looked to have started working.
So I don't want to wax lyrical, jinx the whole situation and then get back to ground zero, so I'm going to exactly wait for everything to work out fully before I talk about it, and perhaps in 2 to 3 months time, I think this should happen. Hopefully.
Also, I want to reserve my "thanks" because apparently when you're down, some you need more than your efforts to get back up and when you can't get that, then all your efforts are going to waste. A few days ago, I read the post of someone I'm very close to on Hive.
From their post, it looks like they've been going through some silent trauma and horrible period, apparently, their life hadn't turned out the way they planned it, and they've been silently going through that pain. Now, I want to extend a hand to them. Perhaps offer them some help, but just like them, I need help too, and I'm still struggling to find my feet again, and isn't being available for your fellow "mates" right?
However, the harshest or one of the most painful moments of life is actually being handicapped and not being able to help when you're actually asked to. Ground zero is a horrible place to be in.
I read the post of someone on Twitter who said he texted someone to teach him how to do about something, and the person he texted never replied...
Now this fellow actually figured out the things he needed and started making money, and only then did the person who he texted years ago replied his inbox, he replied and told him that "he didn't want to associate with someone who hasn't gotten to the top, but now that he's gotten to the top, they can deal".
This is honestly very cruel, but it's just basically how life works. Being at ground zero strips you of connection, opportunities and even access, and to be very honest, it's what it is.
The world is transactional, and even though there are empathetic people in the world, it's always very important to actually have leverage because leverage is how you can actually buy access and it's just how life works.
Sometimes I think it's very important to have leverage, maybe you're exchange something you think you have for another thing you hope to get, because hustling to attain or get leverage is honestly very important, because without it you cannot get the needed help you need in in life, and you're left off having to depend on people who are empathetic, and they're probably 0.1% population of the world and extremely rare.
So I hate not having leverage, inasmuch as I value friendship a whole lot. One thing I value the most is leverage, and I know that another thing that important is having good people, but also, I think the anyone can be good or bad, depending on the situations in their life.
The irony
Someone who is broke cannot offer help no matter how good they are, so most times, I think having leverage, or a group of people who have leverage can make the most friends, why?
Because they're simply offering something of value that collectively and individually change their lives. So it's important to have leverage before even considering having friends or something.
You cannot be of benefit to someone else, if you have nothing to offer, and that's the highest conundrum about being in ground zero. It's a very ironic place, because you're at the mercy of people who do not care about getting anything back in return.
So basically this is why I cannot wait to get out of ground zero, there's been people who have been very beneficial to me, because I don't believe in one-sided relationships, but unfortunately life makes you incapable sometimes even though it's not something you want to do.
Well, the only thing you can do is try. Keep trying, and someday it might work.
