As a mother, I have learned that one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is the understanding that they should never have to question whether they are wanted.
Children should never have to wonder why someone doesn’t call, why they don’t visit, why they are always the ones reaching out, or why they have to keep asking for a place in someone’s life. They should never feel as though love is something they have to chase, beg for, or earn by constantly proving that they are worthy of being loved.
Children notice these things, even when we think they don't.
They may not always have the words to explain how it makes them feel, but they feel it. They notice who shows up. They notice who remembers their birthdays. They notice who asks about school, who wants to hear about their little achievements, and who seems to always have an excuse.
And honestly, I don't think any child should have to beg for that kind of love.
As parents, we can't force people to be present in our children's lives. We can't make someone care more than they want to. And sometimes, relationships between adults are complicated for reasons children may never fully understand.
But I believe we can teach our children something very important through all of this.
We can teach them that their worth doesn't depend on who chooses to show up for them. We can teach them that they don't have to chase people for love or keep proving that they are good enough to be loved.
We can teach them that it is okay to love someone and still accept that they may not be able to give you the relationship you hoped for. But that lesson isn't always easy.
As a mother, I would love to be able to protect my children from every disappointment. I would love for everyone they love to love them back in exactly the way they need. But life doesn't always work that way.
What I can do is make sure they know that there is nothing wrong with them when someone chooses not to show up.
I want my children to grow up knowing what it feels like to be wanted. To have people who are genuinely happy to see them. People who check in because they care, not because they feel obligated. People who make an effort without being begged.
Because I don't want them to grow up thinking that love means constantly trying to convince someone to stay. I want them to understand that relationships should have effort on both sides.
Sometimes, the healthiest thing we can do is stop chasing a relationship that keeps making us feel unwanted. That doesn't mean we stop caring. It doesn't mean we become bitter. It simply means we understand that we cannot force someone to give what they are unwilling to give.
And I hope my children learn that lesson early. They deserve relationships where they can be themselves, where they feel safe, where they know they matter. They deserve to feel wanted without having to ask, “Do you really want me here?”
Every child deserves that, and as their mother, one of the things I can give them is the reassurance that they will never have to earn their worth from me. They are loved, they are wanted, they are enough always.
Thank for checking on my blog and have a wonderful day
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