This is delicious! What is it?
Some baloney you gave me. I found it in the way back of the fridge.
What! I gave that to you three years ago! Now you’ve poisoned me! I always knew you hated me, ever since I told on you for throwing your baloney sandwich behind the washing machine. And now that baloney will be the death of me!!!
You will be fine, I heated it up pretty good, enough to kill any bacteria.
ICK I already feel like gagging! GAG GAG GAG
Here, take this Ipecac. It will stop the gagging. It always works.
Oh! So now you want to poison me with your voodoo homeopathy!
I could give you Arsenic instead, if you prefer. Or both, to make sure. You’ve always been such a drama queen. Some things never change.
I’ll change you into the toad I have always wished you were! If only I had done that years ago, I would have inherited everything instead of only those useless piles of gold he left us.
You would also have inherited the chickens, the lizards, the cats, the dogs and the parrot. I love that parrot. It loves me. That would have been the real tragedy, the parrot living in an unloving home with a witch who had turned me into a toad. Here’s a newsflash for ya, I smeared your bread with that parrot’s delicious droppings before I added the baloney.
This is my entry to @mariannewest's daily freewrite challenge. Today's prompt is in the back of the fridge.
